Really Searching

I've had a lot of time to myself for the past week, alone. Moreso than usual because I've been off of work. My therapist has been on vacation. So there has been a lot of time to just think.
I have been searching through old forums that I used to write in trying hard to find answers to things I can't remember. I have found a lot of information this way. A lot of things that I dont remember writing, things that I didn't realize I revealed. Just tonight I have spent several hours collecting old writing of mine, trying to piece together a timeline of when things really seemed to fall apart for me, when the others started talking and taking over on their own. I have found a few events that I think triggered some breakdowns and caused me to dissociate more and more.
I'm going to post some of my old writing and share some of it as the next few days go by.

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