Leaving the Dark Side

Well, the kids have been watching the Star Wars Marathon on a couple of the cable channels for about a week and a half now, so nearly everything going on in our life has had some sort of Star Wars analogy attached to it... sorry. The kids have been having elaborate Star Wars fantasies going on in their head and when they play inside, and naturally it came up today after therapy today.
In therapy today, T and Jo were talking about Missy. Something about why Missy has decided to be so loud and vocal lately-- punishing us, deciding we don't get to eat if we're "bad" (read: doing ANYTHING under the sun that Missy doesn't agree with). I can remember T saying something about Missy's probably afraid. At that point inside, things shifted and I could feel Missy get stirred up. Until that time, she had just been talking inside to the rest of us, mouthing off, and Jo had been talking for her. But then I remember Missy saying something to T about "I'm NOT scared of ANYTHING." I'm sure T knew it was Missy at that point. Missy is hard to miss.
But the thing is, none of us know what they talked about. Or for how long. Until the end of the session, though. We know Missy talked for a good while because she left us with a huge headache, with our head feeling about 4 sizes too big and like we'd had a rock dropped on our head.
But we want to know what they talked about!!! T wouldn't say if Missy was mean or nice, or what they said-- there wasn't really time because it was all of a sudden time to go, and T didn't want to judge Missy. Dang! Whatever Missy said, it was PROBABLY loud. And probably not friendly.
The thing is, Tuck was listening (when he shouldn't have been), but being stuck in Star Wars mode, he can only explain by saying that Missy is thinking of leaving the Dark Side, and not working for Darth Vader any more. He said that she might become a Jedi Knight.
So, that SOUNDS like good news... like that Missy might decide to be nice to us, maybe?
But who knows! And Missy won't say. On the way home today (when we asked why we had such a huge headache and if she was nice or mean to T) she just said "Go away and leave me ALONE." But she didn't yell it, though, like usual. She wasn't exactly nice, but she wasn't mean either. That was weird. What the heck is going ON?

Posted by pilgrim | Filed under:

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Hey, just catching up with what's going on in your life. Sounds like your T and Missy definitely had a good session. Maybe she'll take some time inside to think about what she does and why she does it. It's extremely useful to know exactley how you're feeling and why. It is easy to get caught up in an emotional moment, but if you can pull back just for a second and think "hey! wait a minute! why am I acting so _____ (grumpy, sad, frustrated, irritated, etc)?" If you can stop long enough to think about it, usually the answer will shortly follow. I usually find after that, that I don't feel as crappy as I did. Anyways, the main reason I decided to leave a note this time (I read all the time) is because I LOVE star wars! "Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering. All are paths to the dark side." Hehehe. If the kids ever want to talk about star wars on AMJ, I am the one to talk to, hehe. Take care sweety, hope everyone inside is feeling well today. I hope Missy can get some peaceful reflection time. Bye! *hugs* for anyone who wants one. May the Force be with you...

Just wondering: would it help to tape your sessions so you could hear what went on when you aren't out?




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