Just journalling to get some things out, get quiet before bed
This is Caroline. I have had a VERY long day and have a big headache-- I used to not get headaches or get sick, but ever since we've been working together inside, I get headaches now (BLAH). I just thought I'd try some writing before I went to bed.
There are just a couple days of school left. That feels really good-- I hope they go by fast.
Today I said no to something at work that I'm pretty glad I said no to. Getting rid of a responsibility I don't care to have anymore-- let someone else take over. That was something I have been stewing over for months, and I finally did it. Told my boss "I'm out". I'm glad I finally just got it out of my mouth. Now next school year, I just need to stick to what I said. It will help us have more time to ourselves at home too and time at school to work on other things.
Therapy was interesting tonight. My brain has a lot to take in, although I do much better at it than the others, I'm still processing things. I'm not too pleased at a couple of things-- our Therapist has made it a condition of treatment that we go to some 12 Step meetings like CoDa or AlAnon. Argh. If there's ANYTHING we all agree on is that we HATE the 12 Step stuff with a passion. But if we want to keep seeing our T, then we have to go to meetings. Naturally, she knows this is a good way to totally nag us into going. She knows we want to keep seeing her, so sure, she can try to get us to do whatever stupid thing she wants even if we can't stand it. I'm not happy about it. The meetings are during times that I have to spend time with my husband on Friday and Saturday nights, during church, and during evening church group meetings. Which one am I supposed to pick to give up? Those things are important to me. I feel as grouchy as Missy just thinking about this. I told her that FINE-- we'll go. I'll take care of getting the girls to meetings. Dammit.
(PLEASE DO NOT WRITE COMMENTS ABOUT "YOU NEED TO GET ANOTHER T." or "YOUR T IS SO MEAN." Thank you. She is not mean or unfair. We talked about it, and understand the reasons she wants us to go. I am just stating my general unhappiness about having to do this stupid 12 step trash.)
God, I am all stressed out now.
I feel like when I go there, its all about taking care of the inside kids and what I can do to help them better. Sometime when I go, I really want to talk about myself.
Caroline
Posted by pilgrim | Filed under:
I think you should set aside a session just for you to talk. Being the responsible one all the time is a heavy weight. You deserve some time just to vent on your own behalf. Possible??
good luck with your last couple of days at school. i hope that it's more fun then stressful.
I hope school ends well for you, and that you get time to relax this summer.
School here goes another whole month!
I think you should set aside a session just for you to talk. Being the responsible one all the time is a heavy weight. You deserve some time just to vent on your own behalf. Possible??