Realization...which is a little hard to take on my own

I had a realization this morning. It is a little hard to take, and I really wish I had Sharon (my old therapist) to talk to. I miss her so much, especially right now. I don't know where to go with this realization, so I am just going to put it out there, and then back away from it and try not to think about it anymore.

THEY are me.
Mae is me.
Caroline is me.
Missy is me.
Tuck is me.
The other inside kids are me.
They're all parts of me. Just parts that got left behind.

Of course, as soon as I realized that, I heard Mae say to someone else inside, "I'm not her!"
and I heard someone else say "Don't worry, you're NOT her." So obviously, the others have a real problem with this idea. I wish they had Sharon to talk to like they used to. :(

But they are...aren't they.
This thought scares me to pieces.
So, I am going to try very very hard to not ruminate on this, because I don't know what to do with this thought on my own. I don't know where to go with it, I don't know what to do with this giant lump of anxiety that is sitting in my stomach, I just want so badly to go sit in Sharon's office and talk to her about this, because I don't know what she would say or how to get myself through this.

So, that's all I'm going to say about this. Entry closed now.

Posted by pilgrim | Filed under: