July 09, 2004

Kind of down today...

My job is just not going well. Today I was supposed to inventory a store and they company I work for called me last night and said that they had over-booked employees. They cancelled me out of working. I know that if I were able to be a faster worker I would be a more valuable employee. But I have rheumatoid arthritis. Both of my wrists are fused and don't bend at all. Several fingers are fused and I have several artificial joints in my hands. What this does to me is slow me down. That and I'm just not all that fast of a worker.

The bottom line is that it's taking a toll on me mentally. I feel unvaluable....unwanted...rejected. And those things are pushing my buttons triggering me into yet another depression. I'm putting a time limit on this one. By the end of today I am going to "put away" my feelings and thoughts that are negative. I'm going to concentrate on the positive. I have an interview both today and tomorrow. Hopefully there will be a job out there for me that I can do well.

Posted by Kathy on July 9, 2004 07:52 AM