Rainy days and Mondays always knock me down!

Worked all weekend, even though I didn’t plan on it. Now that I’ve switched gears towards finding a publisher, I’ve been crazy about rechecking things. That led to some more rewrites and blah, blah, blah, the weekend was over as I tightened poems up. This morning I took dogs to vet for annual check up and they had oil on the floor so guess who fell. I swear it only happens to fat and old people. It’s a balancing thing for sure. I’m angry and bothered that they were so careless in their floor care. Now my neck hurts as well as my left leg and knee where I landed. It’s all more neon signs yelling: “YOU”RE TOO FAT!!!” I’m working on it but not nearly fast enough for my own comfort. Bad day. I swear it’s set me back quite a bit. Besides feeling humiliated I just can’t help thinking why do I ever leave my apartment. I just want to crawl under the blankies and let the world pass me by. If this were a cave I might consider it. This is just the old Posttraumatic stress disorder rearing its ugly head. Nonetheless I hate leaving my home. I just don’t seem to have good experiences outside of it. Even though I’ve lost weight I feel no joy about it today. I hope tomorrow my attitude straightens out some. I’m going to have to fill out an accident report. Sheesh. Life is never simple…. like no duh!

148/80 BP 78 pulse - Down -02 - Total Lost 044 - 372 till Goal
Foods Eaten:
Black eyed Peas and crackers
4 cookies
Orange Juice

Posted by ijellorca on September 18, 2006 1:12 PM | DIGG | del.icio.us | furl