Main » November 2004
November 07, 2004
Getting a Medical Bracelet
First part originally posted August 6, 2004 in my live journal:
Medalert Bracelet
We had a larger than normal turn out at last night's Bandsters meeting (http://www.oklabandsters.com/).
There were 18 people, as opposed to the normal 6-10. It was good to see everybody, and several people told me they enjoy my journal (HI BANDSTERS!!!).
Also at the meeting was Casey, Dr. Keith's new dietitian, very pretty and very knowledgeable. She came to the meeting to get our input on the types of problems we have as LAP-Band patients, that the doctors never hear about. Now, I don't know about you, but this is a first for me. Someone in the Dr.'s office actually coming to a non-office-related function, just to listen to our concerns. Was THAT cool, or what? ...
Anyway! Carrie gave us little order forms for Medical Alert jewelry (http://www.americanmedical-id.com/), which is a great idea. It never occurred to me that an EMT or ER tech might try to stick a tube down into my stomach without scoping first to see. They will, of course, and that would rupture my stomach pouch. So, I ordered a bracelet with my name and info on it (I'm also allergic to Penicillin). I got the stainless steel, typical bracelet for 30 bucks. Not bad. I also have a medical card that Dr. Keith gave me last week. It states that I have had a surgical procedure that limits my intake i.e. I get to order from the kids' and senior citizens' menus. Yay!
Now, I guess it's time to pack for the hospital ... pajamas, panties, socks, toothbrush, pillow, courage ....
This second half was originally posted on August 26, 2004 in my live journal:
My Medical Bracelet
I mentioned a while back that Casey from Dr. Keith's office brought us Medical Jewelry information and suggested that we get some. I did, and it arrived this week. I ordered the stainless steel bracelet. Here's a couple of pictures: http://hometown.aol.com/eljaesteph/myhomepage/bracelet.html
It seemed like a no-brainer to me, because if I'm unconscious, I cannot tell someone not to stick breathing tubes down my throat. If they did, it could puncture my upper pouch and cause internal bleeding and all kinds of other icky stuff.
It's better to have a nice bracelet!!!
Posted by Lj Stephens at 07:26 AM | Comments (5)
CPAP Follow-up
Originally posted August 4, 2004 in my live journal:
Today's Events
I got my CPAP machine calibrated today. I didn't have to buy a new one, which is good, they're $1500 or so. A friend of mine gave me his, as he no longer needed it. I just had to buy new hoses. The machine is set to start on a low pressure and ramp up after I fall asleep. We'll see how that goes.
Also today, I got two (TWO!) flat tires and the A/C in our house broke. Strangely, I'm in a fairly good mood. I think it's the heatstroke-induced hysteria.
Posted by Lj Stephens at 07:25 AM | Comments (0)
Getting a Date
Originally posted July 30, 2004 in my other online journal (excerpts):
I Have a Date
... The nurse called today to set up my surgery date: Monday, August 9th at 9am, 10 days hence.I begin the pre-op diet tomorrow (Friday) morning. Tonight, we feasted at Shogun's. Yum.
So The Bad News Is...
I will have to have my surgery at Norman Regional instead of the surgical center. Dr. Keith is concerned with the fact that I have both severe sleep apnea and somewhat high blood pressure (145/90). Apparently, those two things together are a risk. So, the hospital it is. I'm unhappy about the cost, but I'm extremely happy it's happening.
Honestly, I'm sure it's better to be safe. I'm just a little frustrated about the lack of communication. I'll get over it.
Here We Go
Okay, it's DAY 1. The pre-op diet is underway ...
Here's the official breakdown:
Age: 35
Height: 5'5"
Weight: 398lbs. (down from 410 at my heaviest)
Chest: 62"
Waist: 62" (hmmm, same as chest, well THAT's embarrassing)
Hips: 67"
Thigh: 34"
Calf: 24"
Arms: 24"
Here are my "BEFORE" pictures for your amusement!
http://hometown.aol.com/eljaesteph/myhomepage/personal.html
And so it begins ...
Posted by Lj Stephens at 07:18 AM | Comments (0)
November 06, 2004
Feelings About Office Treatment/Ethics
Originally posted July 16th, 2004 in my live journal:
Updating Against My Will (excerpts)
... hospital fees. I finally got hold of a very helpful woman in Accounts Receivable at Dr. Keith's office. Jennifer told me everything about costs, fees, billing, etc. and, though she is wonderfully informative, I'm at my wits end due to the possible price increase. A hardship, I might add, because I was not fully informed during my initial consultation. Dr. Keith's nurse knew on that day that this was a possibility, but said nothing.
Well, anyway, down to brass tacks, Jennifer, in order for me to get accurate information, directed me to Trish in A.R. at [Norman Regional Hospital]. I was to call Trish, get the quoted price for my procedure, then call Jennifer back and tell her the price, then she would take this information to Dr. Keith and see what he could do for me by bargaining with the hospital. Here's what Trish told me: the price for the LAP-Band procedure is $20,800 without any other fees, not the doctor, not the anesthesia, not the x-rays (or whatever else), just the space, the time and the one-day stay. If I pay it all up-front (because I'm self pay and no insurance company would be involved.), she said happily, I get a 25% discount, making it $15,600. Wow. Jennifer took this to Dr. Keith, who determined that since I would be getting a 25% discount already, there is very little he can do. However, alarmed by the fact that I had not been advised accurately in this matter, Dr. Keith offered to take $1000 off his own fee in the event that I do have to go to the hospital, making his remaining bill $3600. I very much appreciate the gesture, after all, there really isn't much else he can do. I do hope that in the future, though, his staff is a little more forthcoming with this information.
By the way, while I had Jennifer on the phone, I asked her how much a fill costs ... $185. Three are included in the quoted price, however, so hopefully, I won't be paying for a fill any time soon.
I told my Bandsters (the twice-monthly support group - [http://www.oklabandsters.com]) this evening that I was feeling a little wild-eyed, mostly due to being off [Wellbutrin for depression]. But too, I think I'm simply wrung out. I know this process has taken a year for some people to get through, but I'm still just grinding my teeth and trying to get it all done. I don't want to wait anymore, I'm ready now.
And I'll TELL you why I'm ready now ... My ankles swell, my legs swell, my hands swell, I don't sleep right, I can't walk very far, I have to use a seat in the shower, I have to consider restaurants, movie theaters and vehicles for their seating arrangements and closeness to the parking lot. I shop in the grocery store at 3am because I have to use the scooters and when there are fewer people, not only is it easier to get around, but there's no one there to stare at me. Daily personal hygiene is a challenge. And my sex life - nevermind, I'm not going there. I carry around this feeling of being abnormal because I can't simply push away from the table. I'm tired of feeling like a giant, festering social zit. Part of me is actually thinking that all the looks and stares will be okay once I have the band because I can say to them ..
"Oh no, it's okay, I've done something about it, you don't have to be disgusted with me now."
How stupid is that?!?!?Is it normal to feel guilt and feelings of failure because I couldn't lose the weight the "old fashioned" way? Isn't this supposed to be a tool, like any other? And if it is, am I going to use it any better than I have every other thing I've ever tried? Am I going to subsist on milkshakes and pudding, and then complain that I'm not losing weight? Will I be doing this all for nothing?
:: deep inhale ::
:: deep exhale ::
Boy, do I need to be back on medication.
... and then there's the whole body image thing. Once I lose the weight, I plan to have all the extra skin removed. But I've been looking at these plastic surgery sites and the before and after pictures are NOT encouraging! Will I be one walking scar? I mean, I know I'll never pose for Playboy, but I DO want to look normal. You know, I have friends who are very picky about what they consider beautiful. They have very specific ideal body types that they find attractive. And it's not that I want to start flirting with my friends, but ... well, take this for instance - I think Queen Latifah is gorgeous. She's strong, she's beautiful, she has curves that won't quit, and I'd kill to look like that. These guys, they think she's fat, and therefore, unattractive. When they talk about all the tiny, thin, stick-like people they think are great, and then put down all the big, full, luscious ladies I think are ideal, it really makes me wonder what the hell they must think of me! It's hurtful to think that after all this work, after all the dieting, the band, the surgeries, I'll still be fat to them. Fat and ugly, and unattractive.
You can say what you want about it all having to be for me ... I know that in my head. I know it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, or even what I THINK they think. But somewhere deep inside, it does. It does a lot.
Posted by Lj Stephens at 10:28 AM | Comments (0)
Sleep Studies
Originally posted in my live journal on June 25th, 2004:
The Sleep Study and the Haircut
I've now had the sleep study, it was both much as I expected, and not what I expected at all. First, they sent me a packet with instructions on what to bring and what to do/not do that day ... bring your pjs, bring a favorite pillow, don't nap, don't put on skin cream, take a shower, wash your hair, don't use conditioner ... what?!?!? No conditioner? Ack! I have nearly waist length hair! To not use conditioner meant only one thing, massive pain! It would take me half an hour to comb through painful wet tangles if I didn't use conditioner. Yuck! I called the lab for further information.
The reason you must not wear skin cream or use conditioner is simple, they were going to attach electrodes to my skin with an adhesive, and anything oily, creamy, greasy, etc. would defeat the sticky. Bleh.
Well, I had been thinking about a haircut anyway. So I did it. The morning of the study, I went in and had 12 inches cut off. It was enough to send to Locks of Love (http://www.locksoflove.org/), and besides, I do this every four or five years anyway. It seemed like a good time.
Here's some before and afters for ya.
http://hometown.aol.com/eljaesteph/myhomepage/hair.html
So, I went in to the hospital around 7:45pm, checked in and was taken to a little room, much like a hotel room. There was a private bathroom (no shower), a nightstand, a television, carpeting on the floor. There would normally be a double bed in the room too, but when I mentioned that I usually sleep sitting up, they offered to move a hospital bed in for me, which made things a whole lot more comfortable, by the way.
The technician, Ann, was very friendly. I was expecting to be hooked up to wires and such, but I didn't expect the copious amounts of them. There were about a half-dozen on my scalp and forehead, three under my chin, one on my neck, one on my right shoulder, one under my left arm, one on the front of each shin, a tool for measuring breathing habits across my upper lip, a blood-oxygen meter on my right finger, and belts around both my upper chest and abdomen to measure the depth of my breathing. Then she wrapped gauze around my head to help keep things still. I felt pretty trussed up.
There was a questionnaire to fill out (I did this before I was wired), and a few exercises to go through, to make sure the machinery was picking up my movements okay. I had been told by others that there would be a red light on in the room all night, like in a dark room, but there are new cameras now. They glow a deep red on their own, and there is no longer a need for the all-over light, so it wasn't disturbing at all. Then it was time to sleep, although I could have watched tv if I had wanted to. But I was tired, so I didn't. After a few bouts of Ooops! I twisted and pulled this wire off and Ack! I've gotten myself tangled, I went to sleep rather well. Ann gave me a typical hospital call button so I could let her know when I needed help. Aside from needing to get up for the bathroom and getting a little hot (she brought me a fan), I actually slept unusually well for me. I was surprised. Luckily, everything I normally do in my sleep (hold my breath, rotate my ankles, snore, etc.), I did at least once for the machine to pick up. So I guess it was a good study.
In the morning (5:30 am, by the way), Ann woke me up and took off all the wires. She also washed all the gluey spots ... Yay! It made showering at home easier. There was another questionnaire to fill out and a meal voucher for the deli or cafeteria, if I cared to use it.
I won't know the results until next week, but I think things went well. If I have to have a CPAP (breathing machine), so be it. At least I'll be sleeping better after that. At least I hope so.
Follow up post:
More Sleep Stuff
Well, the results are in from my sleep study on Wednesday. Big surprise, because I have a tendency to stop breathing and/or hold my breath while I sleep, the doctor wants me to go back in for a CPAP (Continuous Positive Airway Pressure) study, and there's an opening for tonight. So I'm going. I'll be hooked up as before, but this time, I'll be wearing a mask, like an oxygen mask, all night long. Since I normally sleep sitting up, this shouldn't be too much of a problem.
I don't know what else in involved, but I guess I'll find out.
Follow up post to the follow up post (LOL):
Sleep Study Part 2
The follow-up study was much like the first. The only difference was the use of a CPAP machine. This is a pump that suctions to your face and keeps a continuous flow of positive air pressure blowing into your mouth or nose (or both). I used the nose mask. Here's a lovely picture.
http://hometown.aol.com/eljaesteph/myhomepage/cpap.html
These machines are quite expensive (somewhere in the $1000 range) and most insurance companies will only cover part of it. Luckily, I have a friend who bought one and no longer needs it. He's going to give me his as a long-term loan and we may work out financial arrangements later. I will need to buy my own masks, but I'm told they're relatively inexpensive.
For me, the mask wasn't too bad, but then, as I've mentioned before, I sleep in a sitting up position, so rolling over isn't really an issue for me. I didn't find it difficult to sleep. I DID find the mask and rig uncomfortable (who wouldn't?), but not enough to hinder the ZZZs. Besides, anything that has a good chance to help me get actual sleep and gain some energy and stamina is something I will give a long, hard try before I throw it by the way side.
Oh! By the way ... I had a male technician this time. Now, this didn't bother me, but someone out there might care to know.
Posted by Lj Stephens at 10:17 AM | Comments (1)
More Catch Up
Originally posted on my live journal on June 20th, 2004:
Ruminations
This weekend was my family's annual reunion. I didn't go. I haven't gone since my daddy died in 1994. At first, it was too painful to go back to the reunion without him. That year's reunion was the last place we all saw him lucid. He died three days after we all got home. But after one or two years, it wasn't that so much anymore, it was more that I was busy with work and didn't want to go camping at Grand Lake, where we always were. Then it was a resentment with the family, because my mother was never invited anymore, since Daddy died.
A few years ago, they moved the reunion from Grand Lake to Granbury, Texas. There's a lake there too, but we no longer had to camp. It was a hotel situation. And this last year, my mother was re-invited to go. I've run out of excuses, and still I can't bring myself to go. I know why now, I finally had to ask myself what was keeping me from it. I can't bear to be seen. Some of my relatives haven't seen me in ten years and they would be shocked. I have never been a thin person, but they've never seen me this large either.
Really, I didn't go because I couldn't bear the thought of watching their faces as they attempted to not look surprised. I didn't want to catch them out of the corner of my eye, staring at me, wondering what happened and worrying about my health. I didn't want the unsolicited diet advice and the endless talk about food and exercise that would invariably pop up. I didn't want to be the freak. I've told many of them about the LAP-band, but only by email. They know I'm in trouble. They know I'm trying.
Next year, I'm gonna go. No matter what I look like. I have to.
Posted by Lj Stephens at 10:13 AM | Comments (0)
November 03, 2004
Files From My Other Blog
For the first several entries, I will be posting copies of key bits from my other online journal (see My Homepage).
This is merely to update everyone on what has gone on and what I've been thinking/feeling up to this point. Here are a few excerpts from my first post, June 7, 2004:
Monday, June 7th, 2004
My name is Lj Stephens. I'm 35 years old and I weigh over 400 pounds. Recently, I made the decision to undergo a surgical procedure intended to help me lose my extra weight. I'm completely terrified. Nearly nine days ago, I had my first consultation with the surgeon. I didn't think I was nervous, but I got sick in the car on the way to my appointment. I was driving, by the way, it was not pretty. After the meeting, I was feeling better though, and now I'm very excited. I'm anxious to get it done and get started.
... I have come to this decision because it is time to do something drastic with my health before I become permanently damaged by my weight and unable to leave the house. I now have difficulty moving around on my own and I'm afraid I will become an invalid soon. The doctors estimate that I will lose 70-80% of my excess weight in 18-24 months. I will be on a regimen of vitamins, water and exercise. Before I can even be officially accepted as a patient, I have to see several specialists. I will have a psych evaluation, a sleep study, a pulmonary performance test, physical therapy, and see a nutritionist. Additionally, I will attend support group meetings, which I have already begun. Here is the url for Dr. Ronnie Keith, my surgeon, if you want more technical information:http://www.normanregional.com/body.cfm?id=222
... Please write to me if you wish. I welcome your views and opinions.
... The Tuesday after my consultation, I received a phone call from the nurse in Dr. Keith's office. They drew some blood when I was there, and, though I have never had this trouble before, I seem to have Iron Deficiency Anemia. Normally, anemia means surgery is very risky. However, they simply prescribed me some serious iron suppliments that I now take three times a day, and everything should be fine in a few weeks.
... I am still in the process of getting my appointments to see each specialist before I can be scheduled for my surgery. My Pulmonologist cannot see me until August. CRAP! Now, they did say that there are cancellations all the time and I might get in a bit sooner, but I'm still very discouraged. That means no surgery until September. I'm really upset. I'm going to call my doctor and see if he will let me see a different Pulmonologist. I can't wait until September.
Posted by Lj Stephens at 11:39 PM | Comments (0)
