People are from Mars, I'm from another Galaxy

Today I feel like I must be from not just a different planet, but an entirely different Galaxy. I can't relate to anyone. I am so far away from everyone else.
So. My therapist wants me to come up with a plan to stay out of treatment this summer. So I've been working on that. I thought I was working hard on that, but apparently it wasn't hard enough. So I have to work harder. She doesn't think that talking about things is therapeutic right now because it might lead me to turn to bad behaviors. So.. I can't talk about stuff with her that I need to. I also have no one else to talk about things I need to. So that means that I don't have anyone to talk with about the things I need to. Which means that things just build up more and MORE. Where does that leave me? I feel like I'm exploding inside already.
Really, where do I go?
Who am I supposed to talk to?
I listen to people around me talk. You know what they talk about? American Idol. The Apprentice. Other tv shows like that. I do NOT watch dumb things like that. I watch things like The Discovery Channel, science shows--- shows where I can learn things. I have no clue whats happening on Lost or American Idol or One Life to Live. And that is ALL they talk about. They're lives are about men, shopping, tv, manicures.
How can I care about such things when I am dealing with flashbacks, internal chaos, trying to get everyone inside to get along, Mae crying, trying to reframe my entire past?

I'm just stupid and I hate everybody and I want to go away and I hate myself the most.

Posted by pilgrim | Filed under:


just wanted to say that apperently I'm from another galaxy too, if being from this one involves following popular TV shows, enjoying shopping, all that stuff. I'd much rather watch discovery channel any day. you're not stupid, if anything they are.


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