how insiders came to be

I'd love to hear more about how you find out others have been created, or that they have been there, you've just not seen (heard?) them.

Someone asked this a while ago and I've been working on finding a way to explain...its difficult. Just very complicated. Some things come to mind...

I can remember being around 12 years old and in my bedroom. I spent hours alone as a child, in my room. But I would talk all the time. I had what others considered to be imaginary playmates. But the other night I remembered how my "imaginary" playmates... were ...really there. They talked back... and I did what they said. I can remember having conversations with Missy, in my room. I can remember "seeing" her, sensing she was there beside me. I know that Missy was created when I was around 12, although I'm not positive why, but I do know that she easily handles my dad and his sarcasm and his... "ways"...so she was probably made specifically to handle him. And it was around 12 when things with my dad got much more difficult to handle. I would imagine that I created Missy out of a need for someone to help me deal with him.

Caroline has come up with a reasonable explaination for the existence of Claire, which I would have never figured out myself. Claire is a little girl with long braids, who lives in out in a field of flowers, among horses and kittens and rabbits and there is always sunshine. She doesn't talk, and hasn't got any desire to. She does some sign language. But she doesn't worry about interracting with people. Her world is only animals, and with animals, you don't need to talk out loud, all you have to do is talk with your heart. Claire seems to be more fluent in caterpillar, kitten, fawn, and horse, and with them you dont need words. And interestingly enough, Claire looks very very similiar to how my little sister did when she was around 8 years old. Claire is also 8. My sister was very quiet. Claire is very quiet. My sister is wonderful with animals. Claire is also. My sister always had her hair in long ponytails or braids. So does Claire. Caroline reasons that because I saw, when I was little, my sister as the one who didn't get hurt, who wasn't the target of dad's hurt (she was, I just didn't know it at the time)...that I created Claire in an effort to model my sister.

Posted by pilgrim | Filed under: The Bad Days

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Dear Friend,Again, thanks for posting this insight into your alters. I find your conclusions on Missy & Claire to be pretty believable, understandable. Hugs and Blessings,Judy

By the way, you WERE the target of dad's hurt. I hardly ever was that I can remember. Just those rare instances. MOst of the time he was picking on you...I was pretty much left alone. So, I think that's why Claire is who she is. Love,Your Sis




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