July 21, 2006
I know it's been forever and a day since I've updated in here.
I was discharged from Westwind Eating Disorder Treatment Center on June 30, and arrived home on July 1. It's been just short of 6 months. I've been home for a couple of weeks now, and I'm finally just starting to get acclimated back to life here. For most of the time I've been home, I've felt more like a stranger in my own house. This place doesn't feel like home, but neither did Canada. I'm finally going out with friends again, seeing people again, and slowly attempting to get back to normal life.
Body Image was a definite issue when I returned, as I had gained about 23 pounds while in treatment, and could NOT deal with that. Especially when my twin sister is still active in her own eating disorder. Yeah, body image plays a huge part still in how I feel about myself, the day, life in general. But I think I'm more aware of it now, than I was before. I can sometimes figure out why I feel upset, or want to isolate or whatever, and it's mostly when the body image is incredibly negative.
My first couple of sessions with my therapist here were tough, as I'd been seeing her for nearly 9 years, saw 3 different therapists while inpatient, and then returned to my sessions with her. A lot of stuff was brought up in IP therapy, and I dunno....I think it's new territory for both of us. I got used to a new way of 'doing' therapy, which then made my therapist's usual way not as productive. I think it's something we just have to kind of work on as we go, and take things in whatever direction they go and just deal with it. It's good to be back though.
I've been updating my xanga journal quite a bit since I've been home, and it also has some updated photos in there. (This site doesn't allow photos yet-- at least as far as I know). So, you can go to my XANGA site if you want to check out what I've been doing since I've been home.
I just updated my website From The Depths and will continue to update it with some of the paintings/artwork I did while I was inpatient, and some new photos, etc. I haven't done a lot of work on it over the last few months so I figured it's time to revamp the site a bit.
Posted by Wendy on July 21, 2006 11:32 AM
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I wish people would understand that thin really is the most beautiful, no matter what anyone else tries to tell us. I would love to be like Angelina Jolie or Fiona Apple, and most people would. I just hate curves. But my mom is taking me to the dr soon as I've stopped menstruating. I am not on an extreme diet-I try to limit myself to 1,000 calories and feel guilty if I go anywhere above it. Anyway, is there a way I can conceal that when the Dr. takes my blood-work?
Posted by: Tarik at June 5, 2008 7:44 AM