Just too many voices tonight
Lots of voices tonight inside making a ruckus and I can't tell who is who. Nothing is clear eough to tell. I just can't concentrate on anything right now. Something is stirred up inside but I'm not sure what. On the outside I am looking really calm, just sitting here typing on my laptop. But inside I've got chaos. I've learned to hide it well. I used to "freak out" a lot more. Panic attacks, and crying on the outside a lot more. Thanks to some medications and teaching myself to appear more blank I've gotten better at hiding it. I bet no one would guess right now by looking at me that I feel like screaming my head off. I bet no one, my husband or my therapist or a colleague, would ever think by looking at me right now :she is going insane inside her head.
Well guess what. :(
Posted by pilgrim | Filed under: Biofeedback
Howdy Pilgrim,I'm so sorry the others were overwhelmingly noisy today. You start back to school tomorrow, so maybe you can get some quiet time while Caroline teaches.Thank you again for the birthday greeting,...you are so sweet to remember. I had a great morning, brunch at Mom's and a friend and her 17 yr old son were thre too as a surprise for me. And then 3 1/2 hours later I had to leave because my lower back on the left side, hip, and leg were 12-13 on a scale of 1-10. I was almost in tears. Came home and did the med and bed for a couple of hours and then later went to bed early. I feel better right now. This has been coming on more and more frequently and is becoming actually paralyzing pain a times. So Mom's (I know, I'm 42), calling the chiro..guy that my sis and then Mom go to. Mom was skeptical, as I of him, not chiropractic treatement, but he's given her a lot of relief from chronic pain.So wish me luck.....Usually I can hide the pain & fatigue, but not with this debilitating pain growing.Sweet gal, I'm still here reading your posts and visiting AMJ and caring so much about YOU and yours.Big Hugs, Judy