January 15, 2005
Memories from my past
Where to begin.... that is alway a good question. If I start from the beginning it would take me forever to write my whole story and there is no doubt many of you will not believe half of what I tell. If I dont start from the beggining though my story will not be told and I will have gone through everything in vain.
I will begin now...........
when I was born my birth mom had several complications which left me with mild cerebal palsy and her very sick. I was sent home with my grandmother while she stayed in the hospital for several more days. My grandmother died 2 years later.
I first noticed something wrong about when I was 2. Deb got very upset with me for not taking a nap and kicked me down a flight of steps and stuck me in a cold dark closet in the basement for several hours. I am not sure how long, but when you are 2 any time in a place like that is too long. I was not even allowed out to go to the bathroom and wet the bed for years after that expirence.
I was always treated different, Like I was not wanted, noone would ever tell me that though.
as soon as I was able to reach the sink myself with out a chair I was expected to wash the dishes. That in itself was not a big chore, but if i did not have them perfectly clean I was given a spanking, grounded and expected to wash them over again.
I was also expected to dust and scrub floors along with countless other jobs. All were to be done perfectly. I was almost alway introuble for something not being clean enough. My head was smashed into the floor, or my arm was twisted behind my back or my fingers bent back or I was spanked, called horrible names or what ever else could be dreamed up. I learned not to fight back. I cried, but I did not fight back. Fighting back made things worse. My birth mom always seemed to know how far back to bend my arm or fingers so that it hurt tremendously but they did not break. If they would have broke maybe someone would have believed me about what was happening. The marks and bruises I substained were never enough.
I was always placed back in the home after my birthmom put on her act for a little while and convinced the county that I was the one with the problem not her.
This is all I can write for now. I will write more later
Posted by Heavensdaughter on January 15, 2005 02:31 PM